Where in the world is Leah?

I will tell you.....I disappeared into limbo for awhile.  And I'll tell you why.

But, first, a quote that resonates deeply with me:
 Pain nourishes courage.  You can't be brave if only wonderful things have happened to you - Mary Tyler Moore.

So why the cryptic use of a random quote?  Well, let me tell you what has happened.

First off, hubby has bipolar disorder, type II.  He is usually well controlled but as he has gotten older, he has had more issues with agoraphobia.  Because of this, he lost his job last year.  He spiraled into a depression and became suicidal.  As a result, I had to hospitalize him recently and that is when I found out he had been abusing alcohol and drugs.  He is now 4 weeks into recovery and 4 weeks sober (and he is home, but attending an intensive outpatient hospitalization program that focuses on recovery).  This has been really rough but we are both coming to terms with it.  I'm in therapy for myself to learn how to create and stick to healthy boundaries and we attend a family session at his program on Saturdays.

I've also been dealing with some health issues.  I mentioned before that I had fibromyalgia.  Fibromyalgia is an evil disease, but I am fighting that b*tch with all I have.  I recently got put on gabapentin (brand name: Neurontin) to help.  Gabapentin and pregabalin were originally approved to treat certain types of epilepsy and nerve pain. Both drugs work by limiting the release of pain-communicating chemicals by nerve cells in the brain and spinal cord.  Fibromyalgia is now considered a disorder of the central nervous system and it can be rough.  The gabapentin is really helping, though.  I also managed to come down with West Nile Fever, the not so serious cousin of West Nile Virus.  It basically means that I had 2 weeks of the worst flu I've ever had without the congestion/respiratory issues.  And the fever that I ran from that caused me to get dehydrated and I managed to get a bi-lateral kidney infection.  I'm on the mend right now, though I tire very easily, but I'm hopeful.

I've also decided to do the 3 Day Walk for the Cure in Seattle next September.  I am going to be walking with one of my best friends and I will be doing it in memory of my mom (who died from metastasized breast cancer) and in honor of the Figueroa women (my dad's side, where breast cancer runs in the family).  I am also doing it to prove to myself that I can, to prove that though I may have fibromyalgia, it doesn't have me, and to do something extraordinary.

I am going to beat this b*tch if it is the last thing I do and I am going to live my life.  And hubby and I will beat his b*tch, too.